The Power of Vulnerability
Hello there, writers!
Today we are going to be jumping into a topic that is, literally, close to the heart — vulnerability in writing. It is that leap into authenticity that not everyone is brave enough to take. It is the willingness to lay it all out on the paper before you, essentially saying, “This is me.” It is using yourself as a muse and writing about your own experiences, emotions, and deeply earned scars. Lacking the manipulation of so many other forms of writing, pieces laced with this trait pull the reader into your world, giving them a chance to see you without armor, so that they may find themselves in the spaces between your words.
Of course, not every writing piece you work on will call for this little ingredient. For example, you may have noticed a stark difference between the tone I use in my blog posts and the writing style I use in my personal essays and poetry. But that is because these types of writing have different purposes and audiences. The purpose of this blog is to, hopefully, provide you with tools to become a more effective writer (no need for deep emotions or pensive reflection of life choices for that). The purpose of my essays and poetry, however, is to provoke emotion and connect at a deep level. If a reader finishes an essay I’ve written and they feel the emotion of it, that is a success (even if the emotion is a sad one). If they read one of my blog posts and feel depressed, then I’ve missed the mark. The wonderful thing about writers is that we can do both! Just like our personalities are not just sad or funny, our writing can vary according to the needs of the piece we have on our desk.
I know. You may not have a job where vulnerability in writing is appropriate. Probably very few of us do. But, even if most of your writing falls along the lines of upbeat blog posts, the YA fantasy novel sitting unfinished on your desk, or reviews of recent movies that everyone is talking about, don’t brush off the value of occasionally testing the waters of vulnerability with a personal essay or two. Whether you have been writing for years or you are just beginning to put your toe in the waters of publishing, developing this skill can be life-changing. So here are some ways to break through that barrier:
Write About What Scares You
I’m not talking about spiders, or cockroaches, or clowns (although, now that I think about it, a good clown story might work). I’m alluding to those deeper things that have affected your life. The ones that have embedded themselves in the stories you tell and the secrets you keep. Often these are the things we avoid writing about because they never come to us without tendrils of emotions that we don’t like spending time with. But authentic emotion is what makes writing impactful. And you never know who you may help in the process. By sharing your story, others are given the gift of knowing they aren’t alone.
Write About What Changed You
This one requires reflection and time. As we grow older, we experience things, good and bad, that change who we are in the process. Often these are the same milestones that most people walk through at some point during their journey here on earth. Taking the time to examine these periods in your life and explore their impact can become a tool for readers to be able to do the same. Trying to do this without vulnerability leaves the piece feeling shallow and instructive. While we may prefer this approach in the directions for the bookcase we need to put together, when we are talking about falling in love, losing a parent, or getting a divorce we need something more. Finding a writer brave enough to walk us through their experience can help us navigate the same waters more easily ourselves.
Embrace Your Fear of Rejection
One thing I realized when I started writing honestly about my life, was that others might not like it. They might say it is too emotional or too serious and I knew that would be hard to hear. But the reality is that life is a mix of ups and downs and writing about only one presents a shallow picture. While we all desire to live a life of happiness and contentment, it is the hard things that make use stronger. Why not embrace the complexity of our experiences and use them to create something beautiful in the process? Even if others don’t always like what you’ve created, by being vulnerable and daring to go deep places you come out on the other side a better writer and a wiser human being.
Change Your Mindset
As writers we are skilled at crafting convincing pictures in readers’ minds. We can take something that doesn’t exist and bring it into existence with words. We are magicians, waving our black and white wand, leaving our audience in awe of the tales we can tell. Vulnerability, on the other hand, requires us to pull back the curtain and let people in on what is going on behind the scenes. And we don’t tend to like feeling exposed (surely, I’m not the only one). Just remember that exposure is not always a bad thing. In fact, vulnerability is necessary for relationships and connection and don’t we all long for that? Changing our mindset to view vulnerability as a good thing instead of a thing to avoid can break down the walls between ourselves and our readers, as well as lead us deeper down the journey of discovering ourselves.
Vulnerability is not a weakness for a writer; it is a super power. By taking the time to write about hard topics, accepting rejection as part of the journey, and adjusting your mindset to see the value of vulnerability, your writing path can take on new direction and connect with others on a deeper level than ever before.
Your story is worth telling.
Happy writing!
